Thankful in November

I Love this picture and it is of the number one thing I'm thankful for. My tiny, darling little family. After four years of living with lung fibrosis I am still tempted to put them both up for adoption as NOTHING is ever easy for us, but we are happy and thriving. I'm also very grateful for the following:

My friends, Kristie and Lisa and Heidi and Nan and Terry and Jenifer especially this week!

My Mom for keeping me in style and needing me and my Dad for being there, making me book the Ranch an extra time and getting a new plane to take me to interview transplants hospitals (the U is not the best choice after all).

Trips, I just love em! Dar and Jade laughing together in Disneyland in August was precious to me. The trip to Cancun was a dream come true. Cellcept, it's still keeping me going! Exercise, without which for me there would be no energy, Word of Wisdom-had I smoked I surely would not be here and my brother's and sister's are all cute to point that out. Jade has a good Dad, and I have a good husband. He cleans, cooks and takes care of "his princesses". Dates, as in I really need one, I want to eat mexican food on Friday nite and laugh hard at the movies! New babies in our family, Kristy we can't wait for you to have her! My home, Ugh it needs some work but so many are losing theirs. Pets, ok Clue our one year old baby just gave us a scare and cost us a ton this week but she and Sox and Boo are so fun and worth it. Creativity, it banishes loneliness, I just am finishing a new scrapbook. Having a good kid, Jade thx for coming home and cleaning today, being my legs and being cheerful and a good student! You make being a mom such a joy and so easy! Prayer, without which I doubt I could face each day with courage living with such great uncertainty. The gospel, I can't even imagine where I or we would be as a family. The scriptures, reading them as a family has brought much peace. Fun, oh my gosh fun is definitely NOT overrated. As in, I had so much fun checking out Jade's haul of candy and picking out the stuff I love and she hates. Have a little fun everyday, for sure! Holidays, Oh I am excited for Christmas, not the stuff but the tree and the traditions and the happiness that is still the same. My Honda, I am driving a lot, I'm so grateful for this SUV. TV ok I love to just zone out to I love Carly with Jade or Cuddle upwith Dar. Books, even better, they take me away. Nature, I love to appreciate it in our beautiful Utah each day and take pictures. The list goes on forever so I bet your grateful I decided to stop. He, He, He!

Oh My! Jade won at the District Science Fair!

Oh my! Oh my! Oh my! I exclaimed as each name was called for fourth place in environmental entries because it was not Jade's name. We got clear to first and her name was NOT it! She stood there, very alone in front of everyone. Turns out they made a mistake and finally after she sat back down up front they called her name for third. I was thrilled! She got a medal and a very warm hug from our darling principal Mrs. Wagner. She was beaming. This project was a challenge from the first. Dad was tired the day we did the experiment. Jdegot sick right before it was due, it got away from us and Dar said, let's just get it done. I said ok. But... Jade and I were at Michael's (Dar was desparately trying to find a deal on a new printer, which he did get, go babe) I got this feeling not to do that. So, I said Jade, we're exhausted, crying and been through too much, but, I have a feeling your project is a winner and besides, if we are going to do it, we better do a good job. It was the least amount of money we ever spent on the board but we used our cricket and she called me the next day she called me (disappointed I was not there yet) and told me, by the way, I won third. Now on the day of the district fair I was very sick, up all night. Jade found a ride to the hotel but they were delayed. At the fair Cindy Burtz noticed Jade's absence and sprung into action. She was Jade's fairy godmother who got her to the ball! Love you Cindy! She made sure Jade had lunch money and brought her home. Last night I got to hug her and we took pics of our girls and their medals (Dar has those) and dished about hand bags. That same day I was sick, Heidi checked on me and brought a yummy dinner to us and took Jade to young womens. So, there it is, a great experience, difficulties and all. And, we got by with a little help from our friends! Thanks, Guys!

Love Your Family? Fix Dinner, an overdo Valentine's Blog

Chuckle, Chuckle, Chuckle. What I am about to say is tongue in cheek but actually quite true. I cannot tell you how many times other moms, teachers, leaders and coaches have commented on what an exceptionally great kid I have while looking at me and tilting their heads a little and looking a little surprized. Because, if you know me, really know me, I'm kinda a trainwreck. I'm creative (a good thing usually), chronically ill, somewhat disorganized, a little messy and definitely emotional. How I managed to be one of the longest married, grad school educated, PTA board nominated, children adoring (to the dismay of my furniture) real, true blue, died in the wool, appreciate every day, died in the wool, made to be a mom, I will never know...really. Except two things, the gospel and family time (including family dinner). I will explore this but first a couple funny examples of the shock I have witnessed at my ability to be a good mom over the years.


1. 1999 with my sisters at Trolley Square: I have 3 sisters and we had just lunched together with our toddlers. My youngest sisters jaw dropped to the floor when I refused to let toddler Jade ride unrestrained in the back of my sister's beemer suv unrestrained.

2. 2001 my mother-in-law, a former principal, tells me I'm just a great mom. This time my jaw was on the ground, she has witnessed my organization skills.

3. 2003 Jade's kindergarten teacher, the beloved Jill Chambers, calls me super-mom, even though I cannot manage to get the right materials for each child into their Tuesday folder.

4. Always my husband and I who are very different, and debate lots, defers to me usually when it comes to Jade. I still cannot believe this twelve years later.

5. I have one child but was unable to allow myself to purchase an SUV without the "third" seat, and we use it often. You would not believe the caliber of moms that have allowed my to transport their precious cargo...it's perplexing, even to me.

6. Anything I cannot bring myself to do (like take care of myself) for me, I can do for a child's sake, especially mine.

7. I cried last night because Jade could not have a certain snack because it was not chilled, I had left it accidentally in the bag, on the counter. Typical for me.

Anyway, I became a mom, the original plan was to be a business tycoon, my Dad and I even discussed how Dar would be the more present parent, while I entertained clients at dinners. I went to MBA school, then suddenly inexplicably left it, built a home in Layton, embraced the gospel more than ever and got blessed with Jade.

Long before Stouffer's said so, I heard about a study about family dinners and how great they were, I was very impressed. I am an even bigger believer in family prayer, meetings, scripture study and prayer. But say a little prayer for me because the rules have changed. Now that I have a tween, being a good mom means being at the ready (cell phone cannot be off or lost or not charged). Having an always picked up home helps a lot, organization is job one ( if you miss a beat, you lose their trust and confidence). And you can never get away with being a "bum" for a couple days because you are really sick, had a really bad day pain-wise, and just don't feel like doing your hair and making the bed. Your daughter, my daughter Jade, needs THAT kind of mom now. I have to be an example and invoke confidence. HEAVEN HELP ME!!!! But, I was a really neat kid before my parent's divorce, everything was in place. I can do it. I can do it for her, because she is great, and deserves a good mom at every stage. Just don't mention boys or junior high or heaven forbid college and marriage or I will cry because I miss her already.

Just For Us and Exclusion

At the mall Saturday getting Jade's glasses, I mentioned I had not blogged and she said "mom, have you seen that T shirt that says more people have read this t-shirt than read your blog" I laughed because it is probably so true!, so get over yourselves (you know who you are) and consider your real audience. You, your family and maybe some of your true friends, everyone else is just, well, snooping. But don't stop blogging, like I did for a while, because it's great stuff for you to read later. When I write my blogs I am either venting or capturing memories, that's it, I am always surprized to get such sweet comments from my blog buddies because I never expect anyone to "get" what I am writing about. My blog is just for us, me, my family, and my good friends, Heidi, Nicole, Christie and a few others.

Ok, here I am venting. There is nothing I detest more than cliques and exclusion. I don't get it, I have never been able to do it. I am popular at Jade's school and in our neighborhood and I think the more the merrier. When I see other's purposely leave others out I am hurt, even if it is not me. I just do not get the clique thing or anyone in one who wants to include someone and does not dare stand up to the others. Never had a problem with this, never will. And watch out if you leave me out because I will call you out. It is very un-cool ladies, petty, a sign of inferior intelligence, rude, mean, unchristian, shallow, unbecoming, oh and I better not hear any of my family or friends say what I heard a five year old say today (echoing an adult), "They are just too odd" newsflash, we are all odd in some way or another so get out that mormon ad catalog and order the one about including others because you are hurting someone and that makes you the one who will be left out in the cold. And when you are, call me, I would love to include you in whatever I have going on with friends, neighbors, the ward or the school. You will learn it is much more rewarding and fun this way. Peace

Too busy to blog, Monsters and Aliens and Twins-oh my, Jade's school "Peace Academy", Jade's Garden, Twin Falls, My baby is growing up, Avon

I couldn't possibly begin to update everything in the title but I had to at least list it so I did not forget. I realize I need some extra blogs one for my journey through this illness and different but surprizingly satisfying new life, one to document Jade's Journey into becoming a young lady, and I will have to respect her and not blog about anything she considers private (almost everything) so it may be only for she and I, one for Avon-The Company For Women that has been a this girly-girl's perfect outlet, and I need a place to vent- a blog of stuff that has to go, including stuff I do, the list is getting longer everyday, and humorous, but it should also include the stuff I think is great. Yes, I know this is a huge, run-on sentence and I may not even fix it. I am sure I just made my blogging buddies laugh ( she can't even keep up with one blog) I say, this stuff is too good to miss recording. I will find a way at least to document my daughter's transitional state and my fight against lung fibrosis in addition to our family life because it is all wizzing by at the speed of light and someday I want to relive it. I am cherishing moments, so much so that mundane tasks have become very difficult to perform, until I realized that if I do not do them, they could ruin the moments. Things like getting even better organized, making sure we have a clean comfortable home to have these moments in, keeping the pantry stocked so I can bake anything on a moments notice for Jade and her crew, exercising so I can have energy and live to see these moments, making sure the cell is charged, my Olympus is in my purse and charged and keeping a check on my appearance and what I say so the burgeoning princess will not be mortified at this delicate stage. She rarely complains. This is tough for a creative, expressive, zany gal like me. I hope I can do it with some help and have time to have some fun with my interests which by the way your kids and husband need to see you having your own life, it makes them secure, proud, because your happy, not a domestic slave. So, this home is under new management, I am getting some outside help, everyone is going to pitch in like usual, I am going to be a electronic organizer and list guru, and put my will of steel and ability to discipline to better use, there is finally going to be a system for everything, and everything in its place, and a specific day I do things, unless of course I need to drop everything to take every kid in the neighborhood to the latest kid flick or park because that is why they are all here, hanging out, from age 2 to age to age 15! But it doesn't happen everyday for heaven's sake and I have lost that urge to run, I am home mostly, and it is great. I just want to have fun AND pass out exhausted on a made bed every day, in fresh jams because I spent a few quiet moments in the morning making the stupid thing and remembering to ask Dar to through in a load, I do not want to have ten days go by and think I have not been at our darling elementary, helping Jade's darling teacher, being greeted by some of our little fans. I just love it when I hear, Hi Jade's mom or even better, hi Jude. So, all you naturally organized mom' send me your tips, I know about fly lady, I want YOUR tips

Sweet "17 Anniversary, Bunko Photo's, Avon, and Oh ya, I hate spectrum (gifted) today!

I really need to blog daily, too much stuff happens in a day! Wednesday was our seventeenth wedding anniversary, (here are the bunko photo's, thanks Melissa, so much fun!) We got married on a Wednesday(good, special day, Tuesday's not so good for us) we are going to Tepanyaki (sp?) this weekend and Dar was so sweet. He got me a miche bag, the kind you can change the outside, a beautiful pendant, Godiva chocolate, and the classic book " The Four Feather's" oops should have underlined that, and rented the movie too. This is why, I was watching this feast for smart girls one night, with Heath Ledger, no doubt, I had tried to watch it before but just did not get into it. It was all about finding courage and facing the impossible, something I am doing right now, yep, my doctor's want me to check in with transplant while I am strong but between you and me, it is not the time, not yet. God has another plan for me yet. Anyway, I was riveted at 2 a.m. because I can't sleep,could you? And all of a sudden the DVR stopped, end of recording, something else took over and started taping. I mildly complained the next morning kind of groggily and mentioned that I may read the book before I finish the movie, helped Dar get Jade off to school, and climbed with Jade's blankie back into bed and went right to sleep, thankfully, I finally got some rest. So, when he led me into the front room to present his gifts like a knight, that's really what he reminded me of, I was so touched that he had paid attention (of course he did, heck ya I'm the flipping princess) to my groggy account of what I had seen of four feathers on my HD in HD that he also bought for me when I got sick, and that me, the book and film buff hadn't been so captivated in such a long time. He heard me, he listened, he is a prince and I recommend it but you probably won't be as enamored as I was until you face the bigggest monster there is, fear itsself. Guess who else loved it, my little genius Jade, we watched the second half together tonight. There is a great line about the precious memories of the time we fight side by side, that's Dar and Jade and I, in this desert, fighting side by side, making precious memories.

Avon Calling!

Jade got this idea I should sell avon because we love certain products and had no one to buy from. I thought about it for a while, now I am doing it. Purely fun and shopping and saving money, don't we need lipstick in our year supply? Anyway, it has been a lot of fun and I am determined to use it to do something nice for my family, friends and Jade's teacher's (all of them) that work so hard by giving great discounts, my discounts to be precise so when you get the catalog remember the stuff with a diamond before it, shoes, bags, gifts we do not get a discount but everything else, ya baby, if you are a girly girl or love deals on stuff we have to have like shampoo, some makeup, moisturizer, gifts, the twenty minute mini vacation the catalog provides, then Jude the new AVON girl is your new best friend. visit my website under 84040 zip code on Avon's site, call me if you want salon grade shampoo for $2 NOW, skin so soft for $2, princess lip balm or cars lip balm, tinker bell too .34 cents with my discount or a lipstick for $3 ultra color rich spf 15 and lip conditioning. This is even better than when I played wedding consultant and helped single mom's outfit their brides in 99 dollar dresses by accessorising (one mom cried and hugged me) because this is for us haven't been brides in a while, too. I get to play with makeup, Heee Heee Heee, my first shipment arrives tomorrow! Poor Heidi, first you have to support me during chemo, then bunko, now AVON, you were cute letting me pick products for you yesterday, what a good friend.

Speaking of Heid being a good friend she came to the rescue like a fairy godmother, how she puts up with me I will never know, again today while I sulked and cried on the sofa not answering her calls chanting, I hate Spectrum! I hate Spectrum! I really hate it today! My heart got broken today, people can be so cruel, I am not talking about kids, and I think that happens so our friends can cheer us up. We went out to dinner all of us except Brent, he was in SF, my city, and Heidi made Dar laugh about how I tried to get her to sell AVON, and Garrett and I took pics of everyone. Heid showed me her photo's from her class at Weber (Beautiful) , defended me to Jade, hugged me and told me I was right and when she is a teacher she will remember this! My Nan, mom in law, recent former principal thought it was an outrage the way the news was delivered (COLD), nevermind, I do not want to talk about it to protect the innocent, namely Jade. I am exhausted now, I think I will blog more often, it's 2:42 a.m. told ya I couldn't sleep! Maybe I will go on LDS.ORG and volunteer, doing families group records, it's pretty easy, try it today, or look up your family stuff, you don't have to be LDS. Bye

My Awesome Girl, ya Bunco was great but this was better!

Jade saved the day for my Bunco party! I was having a "oh my gosh I am seriously ill day," because of stabbing lung pain after major home projects for a couple weeks and I felt awful. Jade saw the tears behind my sunglasses when I picked her up from school. She said don't worry mama, I will help you. She herself was hungry and battling a cold yet thinking of me. She had gone snowboarding (was Not going to tell her no) after she made it to school all week, the night before, YET, she cleaned, she cooked, she called her friend to help fill in for two moms who did not make it and she won the first bunco. She was even gracious when she got the lamest prize I had, what a kid, I love this kid, she is sooo great. She even welcomed my guests as I was trying to get ready at the last minute. We had a great time, and a great turnout. Melissa took pics, the house looked beautiful, Heidi made it despite her crazy schedule, I was touched, and everyone determined to be there, made it. Again, I was so touched, my girlfriends are the best! The pics will come soon, everyone loved the chicken pasta salad,yep, Jade made it, no lie, and everyone loved the game and the prizes. Three of us did not get a prize so I wish I had something for everyone, sorry Julie and Janet's friend, sorry me, I was terrible. So tired, next time I will do a few more things ahead of time (like the shopping) I could not stop taking an extra roll but we all laughed big! I swear I only took tylenol for the pain. We missed Janene a lot, she wanted to come and her baby was so sick, husband at a campout. Do not worry Janene you and I will have even more fun next time. Kristi, you are so awesome for making it (early, sorry) after helping your very sick friend all week. I love ya girl. We had a handbag exchange, we were all happy. Nic I was determined to do this update for you we missed you too, you are right, I need to post often! Someday, I won't remember what I went through to pull this off, it is soooo much more difficult than it used to be, but I will remember Jade racing around target trying to find dice, a bell, spices for the chicken and lime sherbet not to mention new bath rugs(oh ya, they were necassary) while while i slowly rode behind on my dorky target scooter watching her tear back and forth between the isles. I will never forget how you told me yesterday how you were proud of ME for doing the bunco thing, as we cuddled up and played my sims kingdom for hours and read the back jackets of the books with your arm around me that you had picked up at the library during a wii break yesterday with your daddy. Oh Jade, my baby, I hate having to be the mom first, the bad guy, cuz when you were born that windy night just six minutes after Thanksgiving Day 1997 began my best gal pal ever was placed in my arms while I cried tears of joy, my greatest blessing on Thanksgiving Day, the best one in heaven that night, sent to to me, goofy, lost, little ol me, enough fun and challenge and pride and personality and beauty and grace to make us a BIG family. And as I was tucking you in my exhausted girl, Friday night, I realized God would not bless me with you if he was punishing me with this horrible illness, he will not let us be separated without A Lot of comfort (and a lot of mommas for you, my gal pals) and promise for our eternal relationship along with Autumn your sister, who I will have waiting for me, to say, it's ok mama, I will distract you, we will be with Jade and Dad and Jade's husband and babies before you know it, and all our tears will be wiped away forever. And us three girls will laugh together endlessly about that day at Target , and how earlier that day everything seemed so temporary for us. That will seem really funny... it will all be ok. I love you forever, Jade, Momma

A Year of Good News! Come back to hear some more

Hello blogging buddies, I am back! Sort of. I am shopping for a new laptop so it may be slow going. We had a great time in Disneyland for Christmas, my husband is happier and it is the ski, snowboard season and I am going to get back on the sticks with o2 in a very cool backpack. I have joined facebook and cannot believe all my old friends that have sought me out. It is very touching. I decided my blogs will have a theme. It's called a year of good news. I have about two weeks of things to tell ya all but I will work them in with each blog going forward. For example, my good news from two days ago was a cute girl named Aubrey at Old Navy. I worked hard to get some great deals for my family and sub for santa project 09 and then my walet was missing. She said, don't worry no one has ever had anything stolen. She was a polite sweet teenager who went and searched the store for me. It had slipped in between the seats of my car. I got 300 dollars worth of stuff for $40 dollars. That is the other good news. Yesterday, I had the opportunity to gaze at the stars with Jade and our bud Sawyer on the way back from snowboarding. They were stunning near Eden. We had fun. Today's good news is amazing, I spoke with todays Oprah skype guest who is hosting an inaugural ball for people like me who have been through a lot in the last few years. Yes, this really happened. Anyway, His daughter asked for my address so you never know. Thanks Heid for taking Jade to Salt Lake, Dar and I are sitting here eating chinese out of boxes. Well, a couple bites. We are losing weight, yay! Well hope you are all well and had a good Christmas! Ours was amazing. Love, Jude

Things couldn't be suckier and yet I am so Happy, Another Gratitude Post

Ya, it's pretty bad, and ya I am quite cheerful! Maybe it's a little denial, LOL. Or, Jade just made herbal tea for me last night and wrote a cute note saying she appreciated me for making her bonnet for school. Boo (my puppy) has been so perceptive to my plight and licking my hand or cuddling up to me. I was out with my girl Heid and we saw the most amazing, huge, falling star right over the base runway. I made a wish. Or maybe it's because my DH and I looked at homes and my heart and a huge weight on my shoulders was lightened. I realized I could iliminate a lot of pain and frustration for all of us with one level living. I had just prayed for help with our layout and the grief it causes when Dar made the suggestion to look. I had this great feeling when we toured one model. We could swing it and in one flail swoop I could have a main level master suite I loved. Laundry, granite countertops, island, built ins and formal dining. We could even have this on the main level and still have an upstairs with guest bedroom, room for Jade an office for Dar and studio for Jade and I. Pretty tempting when I don't let myself think about leaving my dear home. Maybe I am happy because a girl movie is out (twilight) and my sis invited me as well as my dear friend Nicole. It may be too late to get a ticket now but Nic was so sweet because my friends in this group all work together, it just touched my heart.
I am also having fun planning Jade's primary buds birthday bash, because it calls for creativity and I love to try to be creative, and I love birthdays, they are so happy, even for me. I just read Marley and Me in one day, no energy to do stuff, and it is a great book and gave me a lot of renewed faith in life. I recommend it to all. Recently I have been watching Good Things Utah and Oprah because they are so positive and informing and inspiring. I have learned soo much from design shows on HGTV and have tried to do some stuff for low cost or free in our home and WoW how fun! Jade's long time P.E. teacher suggested Jade do the reflections Wow contest on me, that was nice, even though it is not Jade's style to attract attention. We ARE going to Disneyland for Christmas which I think will be a pretty great experience, I just love that happy land. Finally, Jade did a great home evening lesson complete with songs, visual aids, typed hand outs and an she used one of my easel's, how cute is that (not to brag).
As for the bad stuff, well, I do not exagerate. I have so many BIG challenges right now and some I should not even deal with for 30 years from now, I can only shake my head, let my jaw drop and laugh (a little histerically) and cry. Now, do I have a thing on my forehead that says give this girl a hard time and take out your stuff out on her, she LOVE'S it! Because that, has been happening A LOT! Oh well, we've got to give a little, take a little, and let our poor heart's break a little, that's glory of, that's the story of love. I prefer to focus on being happy, yep, I am still grateful, bring it on!

Gratitude In November

As we have smiled and laughed through another tough week (reminds us of fall 2006), I also reflected upon all that we have to be grateful for. I am Grateful to my Heavenly Father who is always there, and understands our joys and challenges like no other . I am grateful to my DH for his ever present help, love, security and commitment. I am also grateful for his patience and clean up of Jade's farm, (1 mini dachtson (sp?) ) 1 cat and four adorable kittens, even though he is alergic.

I am very grateful for my darling daughter, born on Thanksgiving, very fitting, she is such a blessing. This week she was my little nurse, taking my temp and making me cocoa and feeding me suckers for my throat, despite all the work she needed to do. She is so strong and beautiful, caring and funny, I cannot wait to celebrate her eleventh birthday (my favorite number) on Thanksgiving day. She also gave me the best career after my career (Mama)...

I am also grateful for our pets who make us smile and laugh and keep Jade company on the rare day their are not other kids here.

I am grateful for our extended family (especially my sisters', brothers', Parents' and Jade's cousins') because I will always be part of a girl group because of my three sisters, because Jade will always have them come what may and because my Mom always has time to listen and is positive and my Dad always makes me laugh, is always upbeat, and makes me feel safe and important. I also love it when they all need me.

I am grateful to my girlfriends always Heidi, April, Michelle, Lisa, Meegz, Trina and my girls' at Mountainview Cindy, Nicole, Jill, Myndee, MaryJane, Kath, Kath, Kristie, Tibby, Tracy.

I am very grateful to be an American, to vote and affect change, to have access to excellent medical care, to be blessed financially even though I am very expensive.

I am grateful to be blessed with strength, courage, resiliance and optimism.

I am grateful for my beautiful, spacious home even though it is the worst floor plan for someone like me. I am grateful to have raised Jade in such a place with beautiful views, fresh mountain air (most days) a room for Miss Jade, a scrapbook studio, my pretty bedroom with it's bay window that looks out on the golf course (if I would remember to pull the blinds), my little, cozy, bathrooms' and my kitchen we have family dinners in (they are soooo important). My family room filled with Jade's barbie's and friends', and April Ward two houses up, Kenz is Jade's age and she is GREAT, the salt of the earth. I have learned a lot from her.

I am grateful for nature, especially here in Utah. It is always beautiful here no matter the season and is always uplifting.

I am grateful for my education, I use it every day.

I am grateful for my desire to be creative, never said I was good, he, he.

I am grateful for my opportunities to do service, volunteer, do fun things like our upcoming Christmas trip to Disneyland from Dar's parents.

I am grateful for our friendly little community. It is so fun to be greeted at the grocery, blockbuster, tennis club, etc.

I am grateful to live in these times of craziness, if it were twenty years ago even twenty years ago I wouldn't be here. And I am getting better, Amazing Grace. I am grateful Jade will be fine.

I am grateful for my little german engineered Jetta in the garage, turned down the suv Dar wanted to buy me in the spring...but now that gas is going down...hmm. Most people in this world save their whole lives to buy one car, ya we are spoiled.

I am grateful for laughter! Wow, Tina Fey as Palin though I hate to admit it makes me laugh every time I think about it!

I am grateful for blu-ray technology and my hd flatscreen. I am sorry, this is shallow, but I Loooove Movies and adventure and it really is like being there it is so clear and realistic. Plus I love when extra info pops up about History or the World when we watch National Treasure or Nim's Island.

I am Grateful for the Priesthood and Blessings for my family and I. This includes our current great Bishoprick and my doctor's that share my faith, that has made a big difference. I am grateful for exercise, it makes me feel the best out of all the medicines. I swear I will make it to church soon.

I am grateful for every calling I ever had that allowed me to work with the great kids in our ward. I adore them! I have been Primary Teacher several times, Nursery Leader with Dar (precious), Activity Day Leader (oh my girls, I miss you!) and Young Women's President, Wow, that was Awesome! I have always been most inspired around our kids.

I am most grateful for the Gospel. Without which none of the above would be remotely possible and my little life in Layton never would have happened. It's a wonderful, challenging, heartbreaking, awesome life to live.

Thanks, Jude

Witches Night Out, Family Party & Boo, Hoo, We didn't get boo'd! Oh My Dear Goodness! As Jade would say...

Here I sit blogging surrounded by little objects of love from family members and friends who know I love Halloween. (Not a big fan of the scary stuff, just the family and friend stuff) And yet it still stings that up and down my street in every one of my ward member's window's is a boo sign to let everyone know they have already been boo'd (Except for us). I knew I should have been the one to start the boo thing this year (He, He)! The signs are all over the neighborhood too, everyone I know and love has been boo'd. Boy, I need some cheese to go with this whine:} Trust me, I know these girls love me, they are awesome! But where have I gone wrong, we are a prominant family at the school and I always took for granted we would be in our ward. I have always been blessed to be well liked (despite my many flaws) Highschool was the first time this was pointed out to me and boy was I surprized to be voted this and that. I still did not know I was considered popular until my senior year when I made Senior Standouts. I am in close touch with all my friends from then, three are bishops. At my recent class reunion I was given an award and our class president, my good friend, got teary eyed when he talked about my health struggle to our class. I also enjoy close, great friends at Jade's elementary school and have served on the PTA board several times. I was invited and once participated on the Layton Community Action Council, and we have the dearest, most amazing best friends in the ward (The Christensens) So why can't I let it go that except for Heidi, Megan, Janean, Candace and Mandy I am not (in the loop) so to speak. Why is it so important that we be boo'd. Well, maybe it's because my daughter asks why, my dogs name is boo for heaven's sakes. Isn't that a big clue? I am sorry but we are sooo darling (he, he, tongue in cheek) and very faithful, active members. You get what you give so obviously I am not doing enough in this neighborhood and that stings too. I better get with it, because Jade deserves to know her family is well liked and thought of in her ward. It will strengthen her testimony, teach her to love her ward family, to serve and be served with graciousness. That is another thing, I need to accept service more graciously. I haven't let my ward family (except for poor Heid, who does a lot) do much for me. And I need to do a lot more for others too. This is a great wake up call. And if anyone out there has felt the same way let me know and we will make a bigger effort together, and make sure everyone in this ward feels loved and gets boo'd for pete's sake :} Happy Halloween everybody, I love ya tons, and be prepared for a different sister Marchant from now on.

Witches Night Out, Cackle, Cackle, Cackle

Boy did we have fun! Our big sister Kelley surprized us with a Limosine to take us to Witches Night Out at Gardner Village. She dressed as Glinda the good witch and every little witch and some big ones had to have their picture taken with her. We cackled, we shopped the amazing bargains, we danced to monster mash and gave each other little presents before we left. I made bracelets, Kel gave us black licorice (actually carmelly) candy apples, yummy! We took pictures by the limo and the witches around us smiled as we cackled our way out of the limo. I made some friends when I had to stay inside from the night air and the manager at anastasia's attic wants me to bring bracelets to buy for their shop, boy was I surprized. Our three little witch cousins also had a great time at home carving pumpkins and telling each other not so spooky ghost stories, Jade was so happy telling me about it on the ride home. I even found a great frame with a great saying for Dar's parents for Christmas, can't wait until next year!

Family Halloween Party!

My sister Kel goes all out for our family halloween party at her beautiful home in Murray. She helped raise me ( I lived with her in high school to help her with her kids) too so I try to make something fun for her each year on Halloween. One year I made a Halloween stocking, stuffed and shaped like a witches boot. This year I made her a "Queen of Halloween" witches hat with a tiara, lights, candy and bubble gum on the brim. It sat on a plate and underneath hid a bag of chocolates. We won the pumpkin carving contest, and the cousins had a blast playing with the toddler cousins. There are seven of us, I am so grateful to my Mom for giving us each other. She was an only child and always tells us to cherish each other. I love my siblings, my baby neices and nephews, my older nephews and the ones in between. I really love my sisters-in-law. They are all great gals. It is soo great to have family and get together like this, we are truly blessed.

Priceless

Finally, I am blogging again! Ya, I was starting to get actual threats from my blog buddies, he,he! So, obviously Jade has started school and it's pretty great! This pic was taken by Jade's and my good friend Jill Chambers when Jade was in her kindergarten class. As for this year, I shamelessly adore her teacher Nicole Marchant. What can I say, she is organized, talented, creative, inspiring, fair and strict in a good way, warm and caring and stylish. I just love her darling classroom and outfits. Oh and we clicked like Jill Chambers and I did in kindergarten. Each of Jade's teachers have my utmost respect and love. Yes, I have loved each of them, Jill of course with her angel's patience, smiles and ever present camera. Sunny who adored Jade and my DH as he took over my great voluteer spot doing centers for the whole year when I took a new part time position. Jade jumped two and a half grade levels in reading and at teacher conference she said keep up the good work, there was nothing negative. Mrs. Larsen was very kind and assured me Jade had to be in Spectrum or be bored. Myndee asked me to be on the Spectrum Board as classroom coordinator and was very patient when I got very ill, had to drop out to do chemo and helped me keep Jade on track and active in third grade, Jade was the spider queen in their opera. We became great friends too! Mary Jane and Kath challenged Jade to the max and cheered our little family on and always told me how good she is, and again, lots of patience, thanks guys! And now, Nicole. We are only into the second month of school (really) and already Jade has blossomed! She has organized her binder with tabs and page protectors and is handling the work load well. I credit Nicole's calm, organized classroom. Nicole has helped us avert friend problems, Jade's been sick twice (lying right by me now), and helped me see Jade's place in student council is fine. (No, Jade is not getting everything she wants, which is how we like it) So ya, Nicole, maybe you are not the quintesential wife but you are an amazing mom, teacher and human being. No wonder your DH loves you, it will be just fine. And now I know so will Jade, thanks to you all. It gives a mom with a cheery but risky future feel safe and secure. Cute teacher outfit, $50, cute classroom that's inspirational $probably a few hundred, extra school supplies $100, warm smile 0$ (except cute lipstick $8) = Having your child in the classroom of an outstanding gifted teacher, Priceless. Thanks, Nicole , I know it is going to be a great year!

Last summer blast and missing Jade already

It has been a Great Summer ! We just got back from visiting the Grand Canyon with Jade and a her cousin Ashley, who is a great, easy kid. I hiked just about everything "ouch" and the girls had a blast in their matching pink bandanas. We were in heaven, I remember thinking as I watched the full moon, the canyon and the lightening storm while the girls giggled nearby, it can't get better than this. It had been a looooong time since I felt that good though I make an effort to be happy most of the time. We had dinner in the beautiful lodge restaurant at sunset and Dar was grinning ear to ear. He really needed this break! We stayed at our ranch a couple hours away in the new home our parents built for us kids when we visit. it's plenty big for us and friends but still cannot imagine having that kind of money so it is quite a blessing. We watched phelps win his eighth gold medal in our new living room, spent time with my parents and cousins and everyone went on Dad's pontoon boat and rode tubes behind it. My mom liked my new fossil sunglasses I got for dirt cheap so I gave them to her, I only have one mom after all. For several days before Jade was in a lot of pain with a new tooth and after four appointments and seven opinions and me hunting down through primary children's hospital, the best pediatric dentist Jade had her first root canal. I had to hear the word Rare for the third time in our lives, what are the odds? I burst into tears thinking Jade had autoimmune disease because mine also started in my teeth. It turns out it SHOULD be unrelated, she has a tooth within a tooth and no roots. It is right up front, if she loses it she loses the bone and she has a lot of difficult procedures ahead of her including an implant and moving teeth and they cannot do the implant til she is twenty. I need to be here to help her. She was a trooper until it was over and then she collapsed in my arms and I picked her up. I don't know where I got the strength to hold her but I did not even lose my breath, tender mercy. I took her home, she finally got an appetite and then she slowly started acting like herself again. We hurried and packed thinking the trip was cancelled til then and left the next morning. We went home through zion's nearby and we took the kids to big rock candy mountain. Last night I peeked at Jade sleeping, we never made it to more swimming lessons but we had a great summer. I cried again. I will lose her on Monday. Even after school she will be in her own world of friends, homework, tennis, insecurities about fifth grade politics and her boo bear. Once in a while she will seek me out and tell me she misses me a lot and I will get to see her for an hour or two. She is my best girl friend in the world but she has her own life and that is how it is supposed to be, so I better quit blogging because today is a gift, that is why they call it the present, and Monday will come all too soon.

Many Blessings in Our Family! New Baby, A Wedding, Sister's Night Out

Wow! It has been a big month for our family! My brother Jeff and his wife Rhiannon just welcomed Zari into their lives! She is so cute. Dar has to send the pics to me from his blackberry. We had a big family bar-b-que at their new home in the Avenues, Jeff can really cook. We brought a Pie from Marie Calendar's, Yum, can life get any better?

My Sister Laura and Paul got married yesterday on Catalina Island. I am so happy for her! I knew he was it from the minute I met him. We had a girl's night before she left a Bucca Di Beppo with our other sisters. Laur wore a tiara-veil I made her and Kel arrived in her new Lexis red hard top convertible with the license plate fast-pas. That is so Kel she loves Disney like me. I brought party favors. It was national sister day so I made them books and found Wicked flip flops for us all. Kel bought us tickets for April in Salt Lake. It will be fun to see it again.

Girls Night Out

We will now be having a monthly girl's night out and I didn't even have to bring it up. Kel is hosting first.

Our Vinyl Fence is finished! It only took us a dozen years in our home. Wow, I cannot believe it.

We sold the trooper, that is how I got sick today. At nine the guy showed up and I climbed in it one more time. The dust hit my lungs and it has been a rough day. I will be more careful. KSL.COM is AWESOME!

Fair Time, oh ya, bring it on Davis Scrappers!

Jade and I entered our scrapbooks and jewelry in the fair again. We did not enter our sewing projects, because I am sick today and Dar had to carry everything so I thought I would give the guy a break. I entered a pop-up Disney scrapbook. Jade came home so excited that they liked it so much (the ladies that take the entries) she thought I was nuts at first and hid the pop up photo album I planned to convert, oh brother. She said in shock, "Mom, they thought it was sooo cute, it really is Mom, I am glad you didn't listen to me." Jade's Scrapbook is titled "My Wonderful Childhood" I was glad she still thinks that, it isn't very easy having a sick Mom. The bracelet she entered was remade by the bead shop and is on display at Treasure Beads. It is pretty cute. Dar was sooo nice to take everything and put up with the mess I made in my new studio and go without home made dinners all week while we finished up! Thanks, Honey!

My Day Tripper Post didn't work, Dang ! Quick Update

Quick Update, really! Ok I have to redo the Daytripper post but we have been to Park City, Bear Lake, Eagle Mountain City, Provo-Sundance, Antelope Island, Tracy Aviary, Utah's Ghost Towns. Tons of fun, gas was worth it! Jade went to Day Camp and loved it. We leave with my parents for the Grand Canyon next Wednesday!

Jade's First Fish!

Jade Colleen Marchant whose ancestors were mighty fisherman in the streams and rivers surrounding peoa finally caught her first fish no where near there as we were hiking and testing the waters at Mirror Lake, in "The Uinta's" our favorite summer outdoor place to be! Her mom of course was finally exhausted, collapsed in the car and was no where near the scene for the only time since Jade learned to hold the rod and that is the time mother nature picked to knight Jade with her first fish! Dad was on hand to see the spectacle, capture the moment and capture the glory on film! No Fair! The first thing she shouted though was "Mom" and I heard her so all was not lost. The fish had been released, contrary to my specific instructions to keep it long enough for me to see it so I did what I always do in these situations I started to tear up. I quickly realized though, I was ruining the moment, so I wiped my eyes and congratulated the little sprite! Way to go Jade! It's about time!!! In other, less important news yet it also made us very happy, Jude hiked the 2.5 miles around Mirror Lake earlier that day in good time. Dar and Jade plan to award Jude with the "Mom made it around Mirror Lake Medal or MMAMLM!

We had a great fourth the days before with old fashioned games of badmitten a puzzle a flag cake a trip to get snow cones hot dogs grilled for lunch and a traditional movie during the hottest part of the day! We went to see Hancock, Jade and I love Will Smith and it was a pretty cute show over all albeit a little strange. We then had italian for dinner at Fizoli's "I ask, what is more American" and took Boo to the fireworks. It was great to see Jade happily playing with Boo instead of missing her cousins or watching other siblings and wishing she had some.

In still other news The Marchant Girls now have a studio! I went on to my friend Megan's site to see what was up and I noticed under her "currently stalking" that she had a link for crafty storage. This blog was all I needed to get motivated to finally transform our spare room into a studio. It was pretty difficult because I was determined to do it that day and everyone who could help was gone. Dar could not believe the amounts of stuff I bagged and tagged for storage and donation. In design remix they use mainly what they can grab from other places. I did this and was able to build a full wall of storage with one new Ikea cute "wall thing" one white shelf, two telephone tables with a shelf each a white wicker chest of drawers , a four drawer wicker and wood smallish storage chest my sister gave us one year and ten open square storage cubes I picked up Monday at the dollar store. On the other side is my nice desk that the shelf unit holds three fabric lined wicker baskets I took from my bedroom and on the closet door announces the name "J and J Studio" in colorful wall words I also found at the dollar store. We placed colored pencils, markers, and all our scissors in classy matching office supply metal mesh cups on top of the shelf and bought a two dollar big white J which sits above the shelf. Then on Thursday when we were in Salt Lake I picked up a five dollar funky pink desk lamp at IKEA (love that place!) for the desk. We then began to gather "our stuff" from the areas in our home we used to work and organized everything we had just sitting in boxes so bonus, the rest of the house is basically free of most clutter. There is still more to do but I am very excited about this, between the hike and being able to tackel this room signals we will be able to do what we set our minds to as a family, I am ready to ride Wicked at Lagoon, Bring it on! pics of studio up soon!

Tagged- Thanks Heid.

Before I begin I will echo my friend Megan's sentiments when I say sometimes we are not permitted to know why. Today I was at Barnes & Noble picking up a book I had ordered and trying to be patient because my little family was home on our sectional, cuddled up together watching t.v. our trip to the Uinta's postponed til tomorrow, when, I got terrible news. A young Mom in our ward has been diagnosed with a rare form of breast cancer. My heart aches for her and the battle she has ahead. I know what some of her thoughts are, I've been there. My lung fibrosis is rare and aggressive. I lost 70% of my lung capacity in just a few months. I am currently taking a powerful chemotherapy six pills a day to stave it off. But it's working, I have lung transplant to fall back on and I know that my prayer's and that of my family, friends and even Doctor's have a lot to do with it. So, please pray for her, she has three little kids, a young husband and a lot to do still.

Ten Years Ago- 1998
Jade was six months old. She said WoW as her first word, she was doing stuff 18 month olds were doing. We had these cards of animals. We would line them up three at a time and she would point out the cow the bird, she loved mary poppins and said mommy when she saw Lara Croft on the computer. She could do puzzles. Heid and I took our kids to the park in strollers together. I discovered scrapbooking, Dar still worked for AT&T. I still drove my mx6, I was planning a trip to Canada the next month, one of our homes away from home.

Five Years Ago- One of the sweetest times of my life. Jade was five. About to start kindergarten. We went to Lagoon every Wednesday we could with our passes. I worked part time at David's Bridal. We went to Mesa Verde on Vacation, we had a great time.

Five Months Ago- We were about to go to Disneyworld. I was still in grief that had finally come over the change my lungs had brought to our lives. Dar and Jade went Skiing and Snowboarding without me, a very tough time. Disneyworld was great for the most part. I turned 39. Things were about to get much better. I came home and prayed I could go without o2 like I had in Florida. My prayer was answered. Miracles do happen.

Five Bad Habits- I need to think before I talk. I resist change. I can be impulsive. I procrastinate. I am sometimes too optimistic.

Five Places I have lived -

Salt Lake East Bench
Denver, Colorado
Phoeniz, Arizona
Central California
Salt Lake West Side

Five things People don't know about Me-

I was nominated five different times for homecoming queen
I am considering getting my master's degree
Last July I was very near death, I live on chemotherapy, miracles do happen
I really, really love my family too much, did I jinx myself?
I can sew, I just made a handbag while my daughter sewed a dress.